I really feel it. Do parents really love thier children? If yes, why do they insist their children to do the things which children do not like?
For example, school education. A large percentage of children does not like school. They go to school just because there is a force at home by parents. Why do parents push them to school? Because, parents want them go away at least for the day. They cannot afford their children for even a few hours. Because, children are creative and therefore, hyper active. They need activities to spend thier god-given abundant energy. Unless parents meticulously plan for activities for the day, the child would get into destructive activities by his own. In this context, the child does not understand that it would amount to destructive activity. It is 'destructive' only for parents. Breaking a glass or dismantling a toy, or defacing a picture, it shows the creativity of the child and it learns something out of it. Doing and learning! However, we term it destructive. They learn many things by seeing places and things, meeting people, travelling around. Play makes them happy and energetic. Playing with other children makes the child develop skills and strategies other than mental and physical growth.
I wonder why parents prevent children from playing in the sun? In fact, sun is the source of abundant energy. By playing in the sun, child gets sufficient vitamin D. If they get irritated by sun, they will naturally get into home back. However, parents get scared or concerned about child's health!
Children dislike confinement, whether it is school or house. By nature, they love to move around, see and feel new things, run around happily, and move on without any stress. They cannot afford boredom. They cannot afford repetition. They are unable to bear insult or humiliation, especially in front of others.
Education is the key word of paretns these days. What does education mean for them? Reading the text book continuously, doing home work, attending school regularly. They are not worried if child did not play today. They are least bothered about whether child got sunlight or not. They are not concerned about child's exercise of the day. But, definitely worried about the home work or progress card.
The education system, especially the private type, has exerted lot of pressure on children. Unbearable stress! Having tired of the stress, some children choose to kill themselves. Like the one killed himself in front of the Bengaluru Namma Metro a few days ago or the Engineering student in a hostel in Mysore. Young children cannot choose to do it till they grow.
Every parent knows how to give stress or tension to the child. But, none knows how to get the child out of stress or tension. Everyone wants tense-free life. There are clinics to make them tense-free.
Why do parents insist thier child to gain maximum marks in the class, that too from LKG to 9th standard? All of us know that the school records in these classes never come for help of the child in his/her future. At present, the SSLC record only will be of help. In another few years, that also will disappear and the PU record only will remain. Being this is the situation, why do parents put them in dock? Why do they give stressful study holidays? If the child get first rank in 2nd standard or 6th standard, what difference does it make in his/her future life? Does it reflect in the final records? In fact, none understands that the child will get a cumulative record of stress and tension in the future. By that time, child will not be able to manage stress as it would have become part of his/her lifestyle. And you know, stress is one of the major reasons for obesity, diabetes and related diseases.
Imagine, you do all such efforts on your girl child. If she elopes with someone at the age of 14 or 15, what will you do? All your efforts go in vain! There is an increasing number of girl children eloping with young men. They find it a solace or salvation from the uninterrupted pressure of parents.
Why to put pressure on children? Let them go to school and feel the community of children and adults. Let them play as they want. Let them read as they like. Provide them all the things that they would improve their psycho-social status. Let us not tease or harass them even if they score less in exams. Education is not for competition. It is for the social, mental, emotional development and human values. Let us help them grow in such environ. That would be the great contribution we as parents can do.
(I thought of writing it when I came to know about yesterday's Mysore incident of a 12 year old girl who was forced to beg in streets by her own father as a punishment for scoring less marks.)
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